If We Were Having Coffee…

If we were having coffeeIf we were having coffee is a blogging community idea, where bloggers publish posts about what they’d like to say to their readers if they were sitting down together having a casual cup of coffee.

In my mind, we’re sitting in a small rustic coffee shop, tucked away down a cobbled street. It has oak tables, vintage cutlery and copper decor with dim lighting, and The Civil Wars are playing in the background.  What are you waiting for? Snug in, grab a beverage, and let’s chat!

~ * ~

If we were having coffee txt 2
I’d say hello lovely bloggers, it’s me, I’m alive! Contrary to popular belief, I haven’t been spirited away to join a secret Wiccan coven, I haven’t disappeared to study dragons in Peru (I wish), nor was I kidnapped by nargles…
I can’t even feign a flu powder disaster to explain my absence (something tells me you wouldn’t believe me).

If we were having coffee txt 2
I’d tell you that I’ve really missed chatting with my blogging friends! No one in the real world is half so passionate about books; *whispers* nor so up for intelligent, passionate debate. You people, YOU are more awesome than you realise.

If we were having coffee txt 2
I’d tell you that I’m kind of terrified that I’m talking to myself right now, and that everyone has moved on to bigger and better things.

If we were having coffee txt 2
I’d apologize for disappearing without a trace for 4 months with no warning, nor any explanation as to when I’d be back. Heck, I’d give Amy from Gone Girl a run for her money. The truth is, I became disillusioned with this blog; I lost my way. It became more chore than fun, more salad than chocolate chip ice cream and that saddened me. Where had my passion and drive gone? I don’t know. I’m still trying to find it…

If we were having coffee txt 2
I’d tell you that I’m so, so happy at the moment. Life is going great. I’m overanalysing less, making positive choices, taking chances and trying new things. Maybe that’s in part why I’ve been blogging less. This blog was a crutch for a long time, a place for me to escape where people approved of me and my words. Now I have those caring people outside of the virtual world too.

If we were having coffee txt 2
I’d tell you I’ve been crazy busy! My part-time job at a hotel quickly changed to full time when we got a new manager and half the team quit (the manager was awful, and has since been fired after months of disaster). Some weeks, I was working 6 out of 7 days at unsociable hours, chatting to lost souls as they nursed their drinks at the hotel bar. I can’t even tell you how worthy the hotel I work for is of its own sitcom. One day we have drug dealers, prostitutes and unsavory characters. Another day we have hysterical wedding guests crying at the reception desk. One week we had a leak in the basement and had to empty buckets every hour and a half. Recently, we had no heating in the entire building and were threatened with closure. Not to mention after the team meeting last week two people got stuck in the lift and we had to call the fire brigade out…

Yet, my job is awesome too. There are those wonderful and fascinating guests, the intelligent businessmen, cheeky contractors far from home, families stuck between houses that have been checked in for so long they almost become friends, amazing colleagues who make you smile and laugh every shift. I might just love my job, chaos and all.

If we were having coffee txt 2
I’d tell you the boyfriend and I had our one year anniversary. It passed quietly, with takeaway pizza and movie marathons and it was perfect.

If we were having coffee txt 2
I’d tell you I had a week long Italian adventure in May that I never got around to posting about. I visited Sorrento, Pompeii, Orbetello, Pisa and Rome. It was possibly the best week of my life, and a total childhood dream come true. I had wanted to visit Rome since I was about 11, and I’m still awestruck by the experience months later. I hope I’ll still get the time to post about it at some point.

If we were having coffee txt 2
I’d tell you about my amazing 10 day European road trip in August with the boyfriend and two of his friends. We made our way through the Romantic Road in Germany (lots of gingerbread-esk houses) and stayed in a refurbished bank-turned apartment for the night, we cruised through the Austrian Alps which were so awe-inspiring it took my breath away. We tootled into the Jurassic, untouched Slovenia, bypassed unfairly by most tourists who don’t get to experience its fairytale landscapes and deep blue lakes. At this point, we dropped off the boyfriend’s two friends at the famous Slovenian punk festival and went it alone. We decided to explore more of Italy, picking Venice and Verona as our destinations before making the long journey home and detouring in Belgium. Here’s hoping I’ll get to do a full post on that too…

If we were having coffee txt 2
I’d tell you that I wish I could say this was my great return to blogging, but I’m honestly not sure. I would like it to be but we’ll see how it goes. I still need to work out how to fit this wonderful hobby around my new and more adult hectic schedule, and I need to fall in love with blogging again. One thing’s for sure, I’m going to relax the reins. From now on, I’ll only review the books I want to, rather than every book I read (for some reason I used to be obsessed with reviewing every book, and then a pile of books would stack up and I’d feel guilty). I need to get back to why I started this blog in the first place, because I loved words, the feeling of putting them on a page, discussing them, playing with them. I want this space to be all about community and conversation, not likes and stats. Here’s for moving forward. 🙂

~ * ~

Thanks for listening to me rambling over a cup of coffee. Now it’s your turn. What would you tell me about your life over a nice cup/glass of something? What have I missed since I’ve been away? Set the scene for me, what would be the beverage of your choice? What does the coffee shop look like? #weekendcoffeeshare

46 thoughts on “If We Were Having Coffee…

  1. Lol!
    There wasn’t any text when i first clicked on,
    “If we were having coffee”
    So I’d be saying welcome back too!
    And yeah
    Lots of stuffs been happening, it’s going so so
    Welcome back 🎆

  2. If we were having coffee, I’d reassure you that these sorts of hiatuses are not uncommon in the blogging world, and it’s completely understandable. It really made me smile to read about how much you like your workplace, and about you and your BF’s one-year anniversary, and about your various travels 🙂
    If we were having coffee, I’d also order some cake in celebration of relaxing the reins, and reconsidering your approach to blogging, and just because cake and coffee are a natural pairing.

    • Thanks for playing along! I actually love this idea, it’s great reading everyone’s answers.

      Thanks for the vote of support, I’ve seen a lot of others go through the same blogging slumps so I know I’m not alone, but it’s just so saddening when it’s your turn. :/
      Hehe yay! I’m glad I made you smile. :), It certainly helps you get up each morning when you like your job. I know not everyone is so lucky.

      I second the cake, that is a rather EXCELLENT idea. *High five.*

  3. If we were having coffee, it would be odd. I rarely touch the stuff. 🙂
    Very glad to have you back and hear you’re happy and life is going so well for you. Kudos to the one year anniversary for you and your boyfriend!
    If we were having coffee, I’d suggest Lichtenstein. Apparently it’s a forgotten little corner of Europe, but worth a visit. (Source: Bill Bryson)
    I know you don’t like too many personal details about yourself on here, so if we were having coffee, let’s just say I’d be fascinated by your ‘down south’ accent compared to my Midlands drawl.
    If we were having coffee, I’d tell you all about 2016 and what a drag of a year it’s been for me. You’re a good listener, I imagine!

    • Ah, perhaps a very British cup of tea instead, old chap? *dips hat.* I must say I do like the occasional coffee, but I’m definitely a teaholic at heart. 🙂

      Thanks, Tony, it’s good to be back! Ooh, I’ll make a note of that, I’m always looking for new adventures and places to explore. I like the description ‘forgotten little corner’, places like Venice are AMAZING, but you do start to feel a bit like cattle.

      You know, I’m not even sure what a Midlands drawl sounds like, so I’d have to say I’d be rather fascinated by your accent too. 😉

      I am indeed, a very good listener. Any particular reason that it’s dragged?

      Thanks for playing along!

      • Well, the school I worked at for eleven years made me redundant in February (So no financial security, no holiday this year)….I found a new job (eventually), but took a huge pay cut. My manager exhibited most of the signs of a sociopath (No empathy, no ownership of mistakes, constant tiny bullying remarks and put-downs, charming with other people around, etc). I put up with that for eight weeks until I found a new job.

        But Monday is my third job of the year…and it can only get better, right? 🙂

      • Yes, I remember you saying about your job struggles. Last I heard you’d found a new job, but it sounds like that didn’t work out so well. What a nightmare! This mam sounds like a Dickensian stooge if ever I came across one. Seems changing jobs was the best move, which is never the easy option, even if you haven’t been there long, so go you! *shakes pom poms.*

        Hope the new job is going well! Ha, we hope. Just remember, it’s all creative writing material. I’ll watch out for a sociopath boss in your next novel. 😉

  4. If we were having coffee (which I don’t drink, btw, so sweet iced tea for me please), I’d welcome you back! I think you should blog when you feel like. I missed your posts, and I look forward to your less frequent but always entertaining posts!

    • I’ve been getting into ice tea lately actually, it’s strange stuff for a native hot tea drinker, but pretty good all the same. I had a fizzy ice tea when I was in Bruges, Belgium, and although it sounds weird it was actually really nice!

      Thanks for the warm welcome, William, that’s so nice to hear. I hope to send some more entertaining posts your way soon. 🙂

  5. You are definitely not talking to yourself – I will always be here to listen :). I totally understand what you are talking about. My blog, too, became like a chore so I have taken a break as well. i occasionally review too, but then I don’t seem to enjoy the reading experience as much if I am thinking of what I am going to put in my review. Take your time, enjoy life, and do what feels right for you!! Take care Book Buddy :).

    • I am so happy to know that. 🙂 There’s that definitely moment of ‘eep, what if all my chums went away?!?’
      I know we have discussed it before, and it’s such a relief to know that this is a NORMAL THING. Bloggers, like everyday humans, are not perfect machines that can go on forever and ever! It’s just not possible. I must admit I do really miss your mystery photo’s, Cindy! They were awesome. I hope you’ll consider returning to it one day, if the time is right.

      It’s interesting to hear that knowing you’re reviewing a book affects your enjoyment while you’re reading it, there’s probably an element of that in my own blogging struggles as well!

      Thank you book buddy!

  6. Thanks for the coffee and the details of all those adventures. The Romantic Road would be a wonderful route to take…You can always blog once a week and just catch up here..There is no shame in taking breaks. It can be the key to new perspectives.

    • No problem, Pamela, anytime!

      It was a wonderful route to take, I just wish we had a little more time to explore. We only got to stop in a couple of the towns (we picked the best ones obviously) and just drove through the rest. You definitely get a great vibe, though.

      Those are wise words indeed, I’ll have to remember that!

  7. Just wanted to say hello! I approve of blogging as, how, and when you want. Definitely NO FUN to review every book. My beverage of choice would be root beer. I LOVE root beer. 🙂

    • Hello to you too, Jillian. 🙂

      I know you do, I was always impressed with how steadfast you were in your blogging beliefs and how well you kept things in perspective. I would like to get to that point! I love your conversational style as well.

      You know, I’ve never tried root beer, we don’t really have it in the UK. I’m so curious about what it taste like!

  8. So glad to hear from you, Becky! (And that picture of you is fabulous!) I definitely know how blogging can start to feel more like a chore, especially when you are working so much! Although it sounds like you could write some really great novels based on the colorful characters who you meet at work!

    • Thanks, Cristina!
      Yes, I have a feeling we are going through very similar things at the moment concerning our blogs and time availability. I often find myself nodding along to your recent posts.
      Haha I could. Budding writers should definitely consider a career in the jiggle industry. So many unique characters. 🙂

  9. Hello hello!
    First off, I love this idea. I think it’s brilliant.

    I completely understand the disillusionment with blogging. I had a year when my blog and all of you lovely people were all I had. But then when life got better and I had people around me who I loved as much as all of you and who wanted to talk to me about the stuff I blog about, blogging became harder. Well, I had a social life for one thing.

    Always keep in mind that your blog is for YOU before it’s for us. If cutting back will make blogging more enjoyable for you, then definitely do it.

    I’m glad to hear that life is better for you. And I am SO JEALOUS of your holidays. They sound AMAZING. Italy had been a dream of mine for 10 years!

    • Hello hello back!
      I think it is too, and it’s a lot of fun. I wish I could say I came up with it myself, but alas!

      That does sound very similar to how I felt, Bec. The blogging world is such a friendly place and it really gives you space to grow with your opinions and confidence. It also helps fill certain voids in your life. I think most of us would say that they started their blogs to talk about things that they couldn’t discuss with people in their real life. So when you find those people, the need to blog isn’t as great.

      That is very true. 🙂 And that’s what I want this blog to be. It can be easy to lose sight of that sometimes. Thank you. 🙂 They’ve been amazing. I hope you get to Italy! It’s worth the wait, trust me. 😉

  10. Good to hear from you, Becky, and I’m glad that you’re doing so well! 🙂

    Your job at the hotel sounds so fascinating. You need to get all those characters into a book. 😉 I went to Italy last month (visited Rome, Florence, Venice, Milan, Como, Bellagio and Turin), and it was amaaaazing. Can’t wait to get back there again. Like you, it’s been a lifelong dream of mine to visit Italy too. 😀

    Also – congratulations on your anniversary!

    • Thanks, Zen. 🙂

      It is! You know, that’s exactly what I thought. It would be the PERFECT job for a writer, so many character ideas!

      Oooh yay! I’m so happy you got to go to Italy as well. 😀 I’m already planning what I would do if I went back again. I’d love to rent a little red fiat and do a road trip around Tuscany to see the true Italy. 🙂 I’d also really like to go to Cinque Terre (probably not spelt totally right), and I wouldn’t mind stopping by Milan for a spot of shopping either now you mention it. 😉 Don’t know anything about the last 3 places you mentioned. Are they worth a look?

      Thank you!

      • Ooh yes. We wanted to rent a Fiat too but we weren’t too sure if we’d be allowed to drive with the licenses that we had. You did spell Cinque Terre correctly, and we wanted but couldn’t squeeze it into our plan. 😦

        Como and Bellagio are TOTALLY worth it. Very very beautiful. Turin was super charming as well, and the chocolate we found there made it worth it for me; it’s called the Italian city of chocolate!

      • Ahh right, of course, I guess it might vary a bit. For me, it wouldn’t be too bad because the UK and Italy are both in Europe so the laws are very similar. Hurrah! Go my memory. 🙂

        Oooh, in that case, I will for sure add them to my list (I’m going to look them up now). And well, if there’s excellent chocolate it simply must be done!

  11. If were having coffee, I’d order a pumpkin spice latte without espresso. I don’t like the bitter taste.
    Sounds like you’re living your life n having fun. That’s great. I’d say don’t worry about blogging. Drop in n visit when you can. In the meantime, more road trips Yeahie!!
    Btw, your job sounds so crazily busy.

  12. Didn’t The Civil Wars implode after one album?
    (Of we were having coffee is new pushing for a music change 😉 )
    Being an adult sucks. You’ve had a much more entertaining year than me.

    Good to see you!

  13. It sounds like things are going amazingly for you, which is great to hear! But believe me, blogging while working full-time is… maybe not impossible, but it’s incredibly hard. I can’t tell you how many essay/post ideas I had that kept dropping by the wayside because I didn’t have the time or energy to do them justice.

    Anyhow, if we were having coffee, I’d take the first opportunity I had to mention that I ran my first marathon in October! 26.2 miles is, shockingly, incredibly difficult to run. I’ve also taken up Mandarin again and made my first foray back into journalism after a two-year absence. So things have been amazing. But nonstop. I barely have time to read anymore, let alone blog about it. But I keep hoping that one of these days I’ll find the energy to be more regular about things.

    • They’re not too shabby at the moment I must admit. Fingers crossed things stay that way! I never like to say impossible. 😉 But I totally get what you mean. You suddenly have such little time to fit in SO many things, and blogging just gets backlisted in favour of more pressing things. And yes, it soooo frustrating when you’re inspired by a blog post idea but you don’t have the time to write it and the moment passes and you can’t remember what you wanted to say. :/

      Wohoo, go Maggie! Check you out being all proactive. Well done. What a mega achievement. 🙂 Glad to hear that you’re still passionate about journalism and pursuing it. I really do hope it goes well for you!

      Thanks for checking in, Maggie, always great to hear from you. 🙂 Stay bookish!

  14. Pingback: October 2016 Month in Review – Girl in the Pages

  15. If we were having coffee I’d say: great post Becky, I thought your blog had been quiet for a while! I know how it is though, I’ve had many times over the years where I’ve had to take a break from blogging because life had gotten hectic and it was becoming less fun and more of a chore. Nothing worse than when you want to write about something, but when you eventually get around to it the enthusiasm you had is gone. I made it a point in one of my recent blog posts that it’s ok to have a break and remind yourself why you fell in love with blogging in the first place; and to see if you miss it. I also know how it is to try and fit blogging around a full-time job, it’s definitely not easy because in your down time all you want to do is relax! And I can definitely identify with wanting to review everything, I used to try and do that and now I just think to myself ‘I can’t do it all, I’ll just do what makes an impression that I 100% love. Glad to hear that you’re happier and things are going well – sounds like you had some really lovely and fun trips! Just blog when you feel it 🙂

    • Hello, Sophie!

      Thank you. Yeah, I think we all have experience with blogging slumps and having times when life completely takes over, yet sometimes it’s still hard when it happens to you. But you’re right, the most important thing is to take a break when you need it. Blogging should never feel like a chore, and if it does, it’s time to take a step back and reevaluate.

      YES! I’m glad you get the frustration. I really hate it when that happens. I definitely did miss blogging when I wasn’t doing it, but not straight away. I think that shows how burnt out I was with it!

      Yus, yus, and YUSSS. What do we learn from this conversation? We simply shouldn’t have full-time jobs, LOL!

      Thank you so much. 🙂

      • Not a problem, while I was reading this post I found myself nodding a lot, haha. I think it’s probably more common than we think – people just don’t often say it! Yeah I totally agree, after all we start blogging because it’s something we enjoy, so surely it should stay that way to some degree.

        Oh totally! It is really frustrating, but as you say, sometimes you just get so burnt out that you need to take time to re-charge and refresh 🙂

        Definitely not 😉 haha. I started to write my blog posts in a notebook on my commute then type them up later, that way you’ve not got the pressure of thinking ‘I need to sit and think about this and write it’, that helped a lot. But you’re lucky to have a job you enjoy also, I became really disillusioned with my previous full-time position because my heart wasn’t in it, so if you can have that and keep blogging as a casual hobby then it’s win win 🙂

        No worries, I look forward to your blog posts as and when they come 🙂

      • That’s a great idea, go back to old fashioned pen and paper. I thought about trying to do that at work when it was quiet, (my commute is a 10minute drive so no writing then) but I can’t get my brain in the right mindset because it’s in work mode, and of course, I also get interrupted quite a lot by customers (how dare they! :O ). I also find that I’m more inspired and that my words flow better when I’m facing a blog page. Weird, right? Unfortunately, my job doesn’t really allow me the opportunity. I’ll definitely keep it in mind if I get a different job!

        Ah, I’m sorry to hear that. It easily happens. I’m sure I’ll probably experience the same thing at some point! I’m glad things are going well for you now though. 🙂


  16. I don’t think your fans or your passion have abandoned you. But you’re growing up and experiencing the world outside of books as well as in. You have the means to travel, and it has the most amazing way of complicating your world view. Do it often as you can.

    Perhaps, just perhaps, you are no longer defined by the label “bookaholic”, but by the label “Becky”. Don’t get me wrong, books are probably still the first ingredient on your label, but not the only thing that makes up you.

    Maybe it’s time to expand the scope of the blog: to talk of love and work and travel. And books. It’s your blog, so make it a coffee date with you.

    • I’m glad you think so!

      What you’ve said couldn’t be more true, a wise man indeed! My world view is definitely expanding, and while books still have a huge role in my life, there are a lot of other things squidging in with them now that I am equally passionate or interested in.

      Maybe your right, I’ll have to think about that.

      A coffee date with me…. I like that. 🙂 Thanks for the advice!

  17. Ahh, I love this post more than I can say. I’ve felt the same about blogging and wonderfully, real life has taken over, meaning that my desire/time to write just hasn’t been there. Like you, I’m realising that I’d fallen out of love. So, I need to go at my own pace, write when I want to write and not review every book, like you pointed out.

    Genuinely so thrilled to hear you’re doing well (even though you did publish this last year, apologies!) 🙂

    • Yay, I’m glad! Not just that you enjoyed the post but that you get what I was rambling on about, lol. I guess spending more time in the real world than in the virtual can only be a good thing. I don’t think I realised how much I was using it to fill a void sometimes. Now I just need to work out where it fits in my life now. 🙂

      Thank you. 🙂 It’s always great to catch up and see how you’re getting on too!

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